I know I ain’t right, but whatever disorder I have is not in the DSM-5. Maybe someday they will categorize my particular set of symptoms. I’ve never done anything bad enough for them to put me in a cage, but I’ve never managed to keep it together enough to have friends or money or a nice house. Maybe it’s all in my attitude, and there’s no cure for a bad attitude…not one that can be administered via pill or shot anyway.
Sometimes I can fight my undefined disease. Sometimes I even win. I often lose though, and who cares.
Haven’t I written this exact blog post before? …if not on this blog, then on some other blog?
The struggle continues.
I haven’t found enlightenment.
I still yell in my head.
It keeps things interesting.
I am not complaining, I am assessing.
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When I visited my hometown this past weekend, I was surprised by how many casualties there were around town:
Those were just the highlights…the stuff that happened Sunday night, near where I was. I drove past that particular entertainment venue a few hours before all that crazy shit happened. I was out looking for a place to get a quick beer and unwind after helping family members with errands. I drove to Greenbrier Parkway, and I stopped at a place called the Eagle’s Nest. I was in there one time, years ago, when it was still called Chevy’s. That night I happened to look over at this dude, and right at that instant, a fist came from somewhere in the crowd — and crashed right into the dude’s face. The crowd surged: some surged toward the fight, some surged away from it. I just tried to stay on my feet as the waves of people shoved me around. I didn’t go there much after that. Sunday night I didn’t stay there for my wind-down beer. I just peeked around. The place still seemed to have a trouble vibe, so I left. There was this other place, Kelly’s, down Greenbrier Parkway. I used to go there more often. It was always pretty chill in the old days, so I went there for Sunday’s wind-down beer. I drank the one beer and watched a little bit of football. Then I went back to my motel. I’ve stayed at that same motel for years and years…every time I’m in town visiting with my sister. I don’t know why I’m typing all this so I will stop now.