“He who experiences the unity of life sees his own Self in all beings, and all beings in his own Self, and looks on everything with an impartial eye.” – Buddha

That’s one I’ve been pondering a bit. Just how separate am I? Physically, I’m pretty separate lately. Working from home, I get very little human contact (and I wonder what that’s doing to me…are the effects deep…deeper than I realize, and it’s really screwing me up?….).

With the above Buddha quote, it’s pretty easy to see the wisdom in it. When you see somebody with a problem, you think, I have had that same problem. I can relate.

How literal am I supposed to take this though? I’ve read different things on that.

Having any ego at all is bad, rid yourself…of yourself.

Having some ego is necessary. You have to experience the struggle that an individual experiences – in order to be able to relate better…to other individuals.

Lately I’m just trying to avoid most thinking. To me, lately, ‘enlightenment’ is a bad word. A bad, stupid word. Why throw a word at it – – if it even exists. Maybe when you’ve forgotten it – that’s when it’s upon you. I mean: when you’ve forgotten that and a lot of other things. Lately I’ve been pretty good at surrender. I give up. I give up, throw whatever feelings at me you want, Universe. I deserve or I don’t. The concept of ‘deserving something’ is real or not. I avoid following thoughts of it lately.

I am trying to be happy though. Should you have to try to be happy? Well, if happiness isn’t with you, trying to be happy seems like a good start. …It could be the only start you have. I can deal with negative thoughts pretty well, I can fend them off or let them go or engage them and let them go or whatever…mostly…but when does the happy start?

I don’t know.

I’ve been reading http://www.gretchenrubin.com/ I may or may not continue reading it.




About HappyApathy

It eels what it eels.
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